bumbalope

Sick Dreams

No, I do not mean wet dreams; I mean the dreams that recur with fever.

For me, I always dream the same scene. I am miniscule, and I am sitting/standing on a synthetic cleaning sponge that floats in a relatively gigantic bathtub half full of tomato soup in which bleached white cow bones are scattered. With a large stick, I navigate the sponge raft (which is usually a golden yellow color) between the bones; the intact rib cage is especially memorable. Every now and then, there is a current in the tomato soup, and I hear the sound of those massive bones shifting and sliding against the bottom of the tub. And then I experience some sensation that I am physically oscillating between extremely large and extremely tiny or wide and narrow or massive and light . . . not sure how to describe it, but that part happens sometimes even when I am not feverish. Anyway, the sponge raft in tomato soup and bovine bones is perhaps a more reliable indicator of the severity of my illness than body temperature.

The New Year can only get better from here!
bumbalope

Alcatraz vs. Auschwitz

I misspoke in the presence of a Jewish woman, by referring to a "Birdman of Auschwitz." Oops. I had noticed that this woman seizes any moment to let her company know that she is proudly a Jewish atheist or an atheist Jewess, so I tried to preempt what was to come as soon as I realized my mistake, but the wine or maybe even the potatoes rendered me too slow. She jumped down my throat, stating emphatically and repeatedly "Auschwitz is in Europe!!"

I told her, "I know. I know. I have been there. On a gloomy day." She retreated and then almost fell asleep in an armchair.

Remarkably, a Google search reveals that there is a "Birdman" who thinks that he has something to write about Auschwitz.
assigator

Sometimes it is just a little bit too gay

Regarding, this post secret, I think that it is pretty hard to pull off sincere criticism on this particular subject while using avatars stitched from stills of a Cazwell video. Thanks for the poignant commentary.


[info]starsinshapes
2010-09-19 04:22 am UTC (link)
That gay adoption one....smfh. With that small mindedness, I hope you don't breed.

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[info]bikerioting
2010-09-19 01:28 pm UTC (link)
Meet me at the ice cream truck

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)


[info]starsinshapes
2010-09-19 01:36 pm UTC (link)
I'll buy you an ice cream.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

assigator

Spam-a-lover

I usually find spam so unremarkable, and I could not imagine why anyone would bother mentioning it (although I encounter blog posts about it all of the time and wonder why those authors have nothing else better about which to write). Then I received this message the other day:
Please reply back,
How are you and how is your work? i hope that all is well with you, My name is miss vera,i know that you may be suprise how i get your email, i got your email today when i was browsing looking for honest partner,then i feel to drop this few line to you , and i will like you to contact me through my email address(cera_emmedy@yahoo.co.uk)so that we can know each other and exchange our pictures, and we maybecome partner.

Remember the distance does not matter what matters is the love we share with each other.

i am waiting to hear from you soon vera.

It occurred to me that Vera is apparently the dreamiest wife ever. Just look at the first line: a hint of desperation in the greeting, but as we find later, she is not totally helpless nor without initiative. She then proceeds to ask the man about his day at work. Her English is broken just enough to suggest that she probably compensates for lack of formal education with lofty experience in the sex trade. She makes clear her intent to cater to the visual creature of man, but she does not offer anything too hastily (at least, I did not find any attachment or link), so as not to be perceived as insincere. And there is a generous margin of comfort for a man with a wife who displays such disregard for punctuation and formatting (e.g. if she does not pay attention to those details, then she likely will not notice a faint imprint of tobacco despite a pledge to quit smoking or another woman's residual lingerie in the glove compartment). She even states up front that she is fine with a long distance relationship. What man would not respond to Vera?
assigator

Edu-ma-cation

These threads . . .

1. birdwatcher totally pwned one ppk_ptichkin. And again.

2. And then there is the "I don't trust them Libertarians just 'cause I don't" attitude, well represented. Yeah, dude, I have been in "science" long enough to know that anyone who insists on preceding his name with Dr. or on post-fixing it with Ph.D., or claims to have "important claims to work on" is not to be trusted. Ha-haaaa.